I’ve noticed that there’s a topic that comes up repeatedly when it comes to talking about dating issues, whether it’s about the problems with being a Nice Guy, online dating, or even just approaching new people: the idea that women hold all of the power in dating.They are The Choosers, the gatekeepers to the Promised Land, cruel temptresses who taunt men by being attractive and yet unavailable.Because sex is so much more easily attainable for women – or so the conventional wisdom goes – they have luxury of being able to define the standards which men must meet, wantonly cutting off men who are not rich, tall douchebags with square jaws and fast cars.
It’s a cluster of self-limiting beliefs that holds people back from meeting new and exciting potential partners, whether it’s for sex or for relationships.
This is one of the most pernicious myths about dating out there.
The idea is that because it is supposedly easier for women to find a sexual partner than it is for a man, they are the dominant force, the buyer in a buyer’s market.
Because men supposedly can’t wander into the mythical Bar (and it’s a “a woman can wander into a bar” scenario) and wander out five minutes later with a woman eager to jump his bones, women by default have greater power when it comes to dating.
Men have to compete in order to win her approval while a woman gets to pick and choose who she wants based on whatever arbitrary standards she feels like in the moment.